I signed the final papers on the Montana property, yesterday. It is officially "NOT MINE" anymore. I have lost the long battle, and I am worn out.
Besides being the last vestige of my life long battle against the stupidity and greed of American culture, it represented my retirement, which is likely going to be Social Security, if it still exists by then. I'm not sure why I didn't foresee this possibility.
It represented much more to me; freedom, respect for the planet, my Heather and so much more. It is more heart-breaking than I could explain. It was 126 acres of old-growth forest, many of the trees were there before the Native American tribes. The land was alive with wild horses, wolves, bears and an awesome array of plants and animals.
I protected it as well as I could, for as long as I was able. At least it is going to the Sierra Club, they may be able to keep it protected. If the world does go to hell in a hand basket, I would have liked to have been there. Ah well.
Still I am the eternal optimist, I have started over before (of course I was much younger then), and I am willing to do it again.
Last night I deleted the 2 albums of Montana pics, I didn't know I was going to write this. I uploaded the ones I could locate easily, but I can't remember all the captions. So if anyone is actually interested they are back up. (does anyone actually read this?)
here's a link to the Montana Album on My Space
Montana Pics
Oh yeah, Goodbye Montana.
END>
Saturday, April 11, 2009
Saturday, April 04, 2009
Defrag
It was the first moment of peace I had in weeks. Ok it was a little late, but it had been a while since I played. I played the unfinished tracks over and over again. I still just wanted to get toasted and forget this bloody week ever happened. I had been neglecting the few songs I managed to choke out, for quite a while. I admit I have been having a pretty good time, but it is not as satisfying as finishing a song.
While I made these rationalizations to myself, I developed a fierce case of the munchies. I went in search of cookies. The other thing I have been neglecting is my apartment, it was hard not to notice. I should have stopped everything (except the cookies) and started cleaning. I didn't.
See, I was whistling this tune. It was not one I had made up; I may not always remember them but I always recognize them when I hear them. "Hmmm," I said aloud, "Chocolate Chip." The problem with the song I was whistling was this: I couldn't remember what it was. I knew I had heard it, possibly a long time ago, but I couldn't actually remember where or when, or even the arrangement.
More importantly, I couldn't recall the name.
I was hoping the cookies would help but then I would need to stop whistling. What vile conundrum had I created for myself? (I've always wanted to eh.. write that)
Of course gentle reader, you will have noticed by now that the main reason I allowed my mind to wander, was to avoid doing the laundry. Or to forgo the massive boredom of cleaning up my computer-music-workshop (with a bed for when I can't stand up anymore) Room. The kitchen's usually clean, it's only flaw were 3 knives and a drinking glass in the sink.
Even better, I managed to avoid the strain of thinking about my own unfinished melodies
Still the shrill tune mocked me. Even after many cookies, I found myself able to whistle the melody without actually recalling the name of the thing. Usually, that is reserved for commercial jingles like "I'd Like To Buy The World A Coke." Gawd! What an ear-worm that is. Anyone know the real name of that song? Anyone know the name of the (Johnny Carson) Tonight Show theme?
There are a myriad of others out there. Songs, Slogans, Brandings, Icons, Celebrities, Logos, Trademarks.... I have unwittingly allowed them to take up space in my brain all these years. Intertwined with my experiences, the lovely moments and the dreadful ones, Coca Cola Logos. GM Mark Of Excellence (HAH!), and heaven help me "Where's The Beef?".
I don't really want them there. I have studiously avoided memorizing that tripe; muted the sound, averted my eyes, so to speak. Nonetheless, there it is. I wonder if any of my fellow techno-geeks know how you defrag your mind?
I thought about a DVD.
I thought it was getting late and being an apartment-dweller I had to be nice to the neighbors.
I thought They could deal with a vacuum at 1 AM but not guitar music.
I thought about headphones.
I thought of the name of the song.
Screw the neighbors. In under 2 hours, with no one to push buttons for me, I did it (with no complaints from the neighbors, BTW). So it's just me on acoustic guitar and I used a deep spark plug socket for a slide. I finally got to play with some effects on my acoustic, I figured out a few new techniques in my under-featured (but free) recording software. I ate way too many cookies.
If you want to listen it's at the link below, see if you can name it without looking at the title.
Oh yeah, I managed to defrag after all.
http://www.gordonm.com/music/guess.mp3
click here
end >
While I made these rationalizations to myself, I developed a fierce case of the munchies. I went in search of cookies. The other thing I have been neglecting is my apartment, it was hard not to notice. I should have stopped everything (except the cookies) and started cleaning. I didn't.
See, I was whistling this tune. It was not one I had made up; I may not always remember them but I always recognize them when I hear them. "Hmmm," I said aloud, "Chocolate Chip." The problem with the song I was whistling was this: I couldn't remember what it was. I knew I had heard it, possibly a long time ago, but I couldn't actually remember where or when, or even the arrangement.
More importantly, I couldn't recall the name.
I was hoping the cookies would help but then I would need to stop whistling. What vile conundrum had I created for myself? (I've always wanted to eh.. write that)
Of course gentle reader, you will have noticed by now that the main reason I allowed my mind to wander, was to avoid doing the laundry. Or to forgo the massive boredom of cleaning up my computer-music-workshop (with a bed for when I can't stand up anymore) Room. The kitchen's usually clean, it's only flaw were 3 knives and a drinking glass in the sink.
Even better, I managed to avoid the strain of thinking about my own unfinished melodies
Still the shrill tune mocked me. Even after many cookies, I found myself able to whistle the melody without actually recalling the name of the thing. Usually, that is reserved for commercial jingles like "I'd Like To Buy The World A Coke." Gawd! What an ear-worm that is. Anyone know the real name of that song? Anyone know the name of the (Johnny Carson) Tonight Show theme?
There are a myriad of others out there. Songs, Slogans, Brandings, Icons, Celebrities, Logos, Trademarks.... I have unwittingly allowed them to take up space in my brain all these years. Intertwined with my experiences, the lovely moments and the dreadful ones, Coca Cola Logos. GM Mark Of Excellence (HAH!), and heaven help me "Where's The Beef?".
I don't really want them there. I have studiously avoided memorizing that tripe; muted the sound, averted my eyes, so to speak. Nonetheless, there it is. I wonder if any of my fellow techno-geeks know how you defrag your mind?
I thought about a DVD.
I thought it was getting late and being an apartment-dweller I had to be nice to the neighbors.
I thought They could deal with a vacuum at 1 AM but not guitar music.
I thought about headphones.
I thought of the name of the song.
Screw the neighbors. In under 2 hours, with no one to push buttons for me, I did it (with no complaints from the neighbors, BTW). So it's just me on acoustic guitar and I used a deep spark plug socket for a slide. I finally got to play with some effects on my acoustic, I figured out a few new techniques in my under-featured (but free) recording software. I ate way too many cookies.
If you want to listen it's at the link below, see if you can name it without looking at the title.
Oh yeah, I managed to defrag after all.
http://www.gordonm.com/music/guess.mp3
click here
end >
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